Offer of Admission:

Dear Miss Kane,
We're pleased to offer you admission into our program. Your offer includes a $50,000 scholarship, a puppy, deep green velvet curtains, all-you-can-eat dark chocolate (at least 70%), cookware, a taxidermied animal of your preferred species, 135 books of your choosing, a kitten to keep your puppy company, fresh socks everyday, an office, a greenhouse, a proper lampshade for your bedside lamp, however many moleskines you want, and travel expenses (for a trip to California). Please respond within four weeks of receiving this letter.
Best,
The University of What You Fantasize About Before Bed