Jasper

Rule of thumb: The cat always chooses the lap of the woman whose nose feels like it has needles in it, whose eyes are itchy and watering, who has sneezed 10 going on 11 times already today. The cat never chooses the woman who paid the cat's medical bills, who gave the cat a home, who wants nothing more than for the cat to choose her lap, at least just once. The cat can smell her desperation, and chooses the smell of fear instead.